
Under pressure: All in need of quick cash, can grotto department workforce Maryam Ali’s Rani, left, Charles Doherty’s Michael and Roo Arwen’s Red win the Christmas bonus in Red Ladder Theatre Company’s A Proper Merry Christmess? Picture: Robling Photography
LEEDS companies Red Ladder Theatre Company and Wrongsemble have joined together to tour the UK with a Christmas double bill this festive season.
The shows opened at fellow Leeds company Slung Low’s cavernous Warehouse, in Holbeck, before venturing out to Stockton Arts Centre, Wakefield Exchange, Gosforth Civic Theatre, Newcastle (December 19 to 21), the Lawrence Batley Theatre, Huddersfield (December 22 and 23), and Brighton Dome (hosting “chilled performances”, December 27 to 31).
CharlesHutchPress caught Red Ladder’s riotous, righteous new comedy A Proper Merry Christmess, whose somewhat perfunctory set was surrounded to either side by presumably the designs for A Town Called Christmas, Wrongsemble’s family show for three year olds and upwards. The effect was to feel like being on one funfair ride, with prospective further rides all around that started to look more attractive.
Alas, Red Ladder’s lustily performed Christmas play turned out to be something of a bumpy ride, one where you could follow the words on a screen above the stage that revealed Charles Doherty’s anything but saintly Michael had developed a progressively worsening habit of adding swear words, as if putting the improper in A Proper Merry Christmess.
He delivers lines with an Australian accent as disdainful as Aussie bowlers and commentators giving their verdict on England’s kamikaze batting in the Ashes.

Roo Arwen’s Red makes her exasperated point to Charles Doherty’s Michael, the grouchy Santa in A Proper Merry Christmess. Picture: Robling Photography
Whether he or first-time playwright Seeta Wrightson and co-writer Leon Fleming called the tune on his potty mouth, who knows, but it had the look and sound of an actor striving too hard for a laugh.
Michael is the resident if reluctant Father Christmas at West Yorkshire’s cheeriest garden centre, where he is a rebel with a Claus, the grouchy Santa of attention, a cross between the Grinch and Billy Bob Thornton’s swindler, Willie Soke, in Terry Twizogg’s 2004 American movie.
As miserable as Ebenezer Scrooge before his Christmas Eve ghost tour, and drawing complaint after complaint for his treatment of children in his grotty grotto, Michael’s mood is only worsened by store announcer Katherine (Kathryn Hanke) declaring the £500 Christmas bonus will be given to only the best-performing department.
Michael needs the money urgently, having overspent massively on his daughter’s wedding, to the point that the four bailiffs of the apocalypse are about to knock on his door.
Doherty’s Michael is “working” with a “positive Christmas tree” and a stressed-out elf, as selfish meets elfish in the dysfunctional Team Grotto. Michael thinks only of himself; Roo Arwen’s Red, an overstretched single mum, is thinking “How can I afford the present” she so desperately wishes to give her young child; Maryam Ali’s Rani is a student, taking odds and sods of part-time jobs to meet the cost of her accountancy degree.

Maryam Ali’s stressed-out student Rami in Christmas tree mode in Santa’s grotto in A Proper Merry Christmess. Picture: Robling Photography
She’s thinking of changing her course to working with animals, as accountancy doesn’t add up to fulfilment and she is only doing it to please her parents.
In Red Ladder tradition, politics plays its part in Leeds writers Wrightson and Fleming’s story, one that evolved from workshops with BITMO (Belle Isle Tenant Management Organisation) and St George’s Crypt, an award-winning charity that supports homeless people in Leeds.
The gig economy, the exploitation of workers, their dissatisfaction with the need to comply to ever-changing management rules, all play their part in the rising tensions of Christmas Eve in garden centreland.
Management is represented by the intrusive Tannoy voice of Hanke’s unseen but increasingly heard Katherine, at first jolly and encouraging in her Christmas sales pitch, but slowly turning to frustration then slurred panic, seemingly under the influence of more than a glass or two as dirty tricks consume the workforce.
All around her, the garden centre is collapsing into chaos in a mini-version of the Titanic going down, with friction to rival Shane McGowan’s tired and emotional lovers in A Fairytale Of New York, as Doherty’s Michael goes rogue and Ali’s Rani and Arwen’s Red grow exasperated, each having their monologue moment in the spotlight.

Be on Red alert: Roo Arwen’s elf loses her rag in A Proper Merry Christmess. Picture: Robling Photography
Red Ladder artistic director Cheryl Martin’s direction gathers ever more pace over the 75 minutes, but the humour does not match that acceleration, feeling too forced, like failed rhubarb.
Carrying an age guidance of 16-plus, A Proper Merry Christmess is billed as a “a chaotic Christmas comedy for grown-ups – an honest festive story, featuring the authentic heartbreak and humour that the Christmas movies usually leave out”.
Chaotic? Yes. Honest? Earnest, certainly. Authentic heartbreak? Humour? The frantic pursuit of the latter undermines the former, riding roughshod over the pathos in both Rani and Red’s stories.
A Proper Merry Christmess ends up feeling exactly that.
Red Ladder Theatre Company presents A Proper Merry Christmess, Lawrence Batley Theatre, Queen’s Square, Queen Street, Huddersfield, West Yorkshire, December 22 and 23, 6pm. Box office: 01484 430528 or https://www.thelbt.org/what-s-on/drama/a-proper-merry-christmess/.





